Is "Romance" Attractive To Women?

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You've probably noticed that I don't talk aboutthe idea of "romance" very often.
There's a good reason for this.
I think that most guys use romance incompletely the wrong way, and in the process screwup their chances with the woman that they areinterested in.
I'm going to take some time here to talk aboutmy personal perspective on romance, how it ismisused, and how to use it to really make a womanfeel attracted to you.
Most guys make one of two main mistakes whentrying to be "romantic":
1) They try to use romance to CREATE attraction.
2) They use TOO MUCH romance, thinking that moremust be better.
Let me ask you this... What does romance meanto you?
I'm serious. Think about it for a minute.
Does romance mean gifts and flower?
Does it mean fancy dinners?
Does it mean candles and soft music?
To me, romance is about showing a softer sideof yourself... a more thoughtful side... in a waythat is meant to INCREASE the woman's attractionfor you.
Like I just mentioned, most guys either try touse romance to CREATE attraction, or they do toomany things in an attempt to "be romantic", andthe effect is lost.
Here's a quiz:
In general, would a woman think you were moreromantic if you:
1) Brought her red roses every time you saw her.
2) Brought her one flower the fourth time you sawher, but it was her favorite flower, in herfavorite color.
...???
Here's another one...
In general, would a woman think you were moreromantic if you:
1) Took her to a fancy dinner every time you sawher.
2) Didn't take her to dinner, but one night cookedher a favorite dish that your mom taught you andtold her the story of how it came to be a familyfavorite?
Do you see where I'm going with these examples?
"Romance" is all about the context of thesituation. In other words, little things that arethoughtful, used once in awhile will make FAR moreof an impact than trying to do everything youpossibly can all the time.
Have you ever seen a T. V. show or movie with agirl holding a flower, pulling off each petal oneat a time and saying, "He loves me, he loves menot"?
This is a famous cliche... even Madonna does itin her old "Truth or Dare" movie.
What's going on here? And why is it now such afamous idea that it is almost universally known?
Because it strikes a chord inside of womeneverywhere! Every woman can relate to the idea ofthinking about a man and wondering if he'sthinking about her.
Pulling petals off of a flower and saying, "Heloves me, he loves me not", is just another way ofsaying, "I can't stop thinking about this guy andI'm going to keep thinking about him until I knowhow he feels."
As you know, if you've read past newslettersand/or my ebook, I think that it's important toCREATE this kind of situation as much as humanlypossible.
Now, here's where romance fits into thepuzzle... If you're doing things that you considerto be "romantic" all the time, then she hasnothing to wonder about... nothing to thinkabout... there is no challenge or mystery at all.
On the other hand, if you use romance morecarefully and keep her on the edge of her seat, soto speak, then a small romantic gesture will causeher to feel GREAT feelings of attraction inside...and cause her to work even harder to get and keepyour attention - BECAUSE SHE'LL TRY HARDER TO GETMORE OUT OF THIS ROMANTIC SIDE OF YOU!
So what are some things you can do, that womensee as romantic, without going overboard?
Well, if you want to do the typical things likeflowers, gifts, music, poetry, etc. then do as Isaid earlier: Use them VERY infrequently. Teaseher, bust on her, treat her like a bratty littlesister most of the time, then out of nowhere dosomething thoughtful. But make sure to stay coolwhen the emotional reaction comes!
She's probably going to be very happy and wantto know "where that came from." Just tell her thatyou were thinking about her and move on to thenext topic. Don't get all mushy, dude.
By the way, if you've gone out with a woman 47times, and you don't know if she likes you, andyou're now thinking, "Oh, hey... great idea! I'llbuy her a flower and she'll feel attracted tome..." then get a new idea.
Romance isn't a way to make a woman feelattracted to you.
Romance is a way to AMPLIFY attraction that isalready happening.
Read that last part again... DON'T TRY TO MAKEA WOMAN FEEL ATTRACTED TO YOU WITH ROMANCE!
Attraction is created by factors other thangifts, dinners, flowers, etc.
If she's not feeling attracted to you, thenshowing her that you're attracted to her probablyisn't going to change it... in fact, it may justpush her away.
I know, I know... you once heard about a guywho pursued a woman for 9 years until she finallygave in and married him. Well, that might work,but I don't have 9 years (unless it's CindyCrawford... yeah, I know she's like 50, but she'sSTILL hot).
Earlier I mentioned a couple of great ideas.You can cook her a special meal that hasmeaning... and tell the story behind it. Storiesare romantic, especially if the story contains alove story.
And small gifts can be romantic as well (Idon't like big gifts because they change thedynamic of the relationship and can create allkinds of feelings that it's a trade of affectionfor money, etc.).
If you pay attention, a woman will mentionsomething that she really likes. It could be akind of flower, a kind of music, an author, etc.If you want to be romantic (after you know thatshe's attracted to you) you can get somethingthoughtful then write a card that says, "I wasthinking about you, and I found this... thoughtyou would like it. Kiss Kiss."
Use romance as the spice, and not the maindish. Use it to amplify, not as your mainstrategy.
Romance combined with the techniques that Iteach is a VERY powerful combination.
QUICK NOTE: One of the most "romantic" thingsyou can possibly do is learn how to communicatewith women on a "sexual" level. There's nothing aspowerful as using subtle communication to put awoman into a VERY romantic mood. If you'd like tolearn more about how to do this, then make sureyou go check THIS out:
http://www.DatingTechniques.com/SexualCommunication
HOW TO CREATE A SETTING THAT AUTOMATICALLY CREATESAND AMPLIFIES ATTRACTION...
We just talked about how most guys either haveno clue about romance, or they use it too much...which screws up everything for them.
There is one aspect of romance that I havefound very useful to know more about and use. It'sthe concept of how to create a SETTING that willcreate more of a feeling of attraction inside ofthe woman that you are with.
WARNING: What I'm about to share with you isnot a magic bullet. It's no substitute for acocky, funny personality and great skills. Usingthis alone will not make you successful withwomen.
With that said... I've found that there are afew things you can do in your immediateenvironment to "accelerate the mood", so to speak,when you are with a woman.
Women have very active senses... usually muchmore so than men.
If you have already sparked the attractionbetween you and her, introducing certain sensorystimulus will usually increase the attraction, andcan lead to a more, shall we say "physical"demonstration of that attraction.
OK, let's say that you've had a fun night outwith your girl (and of course, because you readDouble Your Dating you knew where to take her thatwas fun and inexpensive) and you're back at yourplace. (Of course, she came inside because youlearned how to get her to come in from the booktoo... right?)
And then you use the Kiss Test, which youlearned when you visited my web site... and you'vejust kissed for the first time. Now what?
Well, most guys make the HUGE mistake of tryingto grope the poor girl... which, of course leadsto the inevitable "I think that we're moving alittle fast. Let's take things slower."(Translation: "None for you tonight, and if youtry that again, none for you anytime in the next10 dates.")
Instead, try this:
After that first kiss, pull back and look intoher eyes and say, "Yum." Then stand up and say,"Let me see if I can do something about thissetting" in a fun, smooth, kind-of suspensefultone of voice.
Here's the recipe:
1) A few candles
2) Some incense
3) A glass of wine (if you both drink and are oflegal age)
4) Sade's - Greatest Hits on low
I know it sounds simple, but let me explain therecipe now that you know the ingredients.
Remember the formula "Two steps forward, onestep back" that I often talk about? Mix up theseingredients with that concept... and VIOLA! Moreand MORE AND MORE attraction.
You probably don't need to learn how to lightcandles, open wine, and play music. If you do,refer to the instructions that come with theproducts.
I personally like to introduce these as greatways to interrupt the kissing (and whatever elseis going on).
Try this:
1) Kiss Kiss
2) "Let me see if I can do something about thissetting"
3) Light candles and incense, lower lighting
4) Kiss Kiss
5) Open wine and put on 'Sade'
6) Kiss Kiss
7) Watch out... because something good is about tohappen.
Here's what's going on in her mind:
"Oh, we're kissing. I'd better not let this gotoo far."
"What? Why did he stop kissing me? Oh, candles.I love candles..."
"Wow, this is turning into a make-out session,maybe I'd better put on the brakes."
"What? Why did he stop again?"
"Ohhh, I LOVE 'Sade'. Her voice is so sexy. Andthis wine is nice. Hmm, I wonder why he isn'ttrying to jump my bones. Maybe he doesn't thinkI'm a good kisser. Maybe he changed his mind. WellI'm not going to let that happen. I'll showhim..."
Do you get it?
By simultaneously creating tension while makingthe setting more and more 'romantic', you willstir up her ATTRACTION towards you and make her bethe one who ultimately gets so worked up that shecan't help but have you.
Nice.
Of course there are many other things you cando that are romantic. Like sprinkling rose petalson the bed, pulling out some Godiva chocolate, orlighting up the fire and grabbing a blankie (makesure you don't bring out your teddy-bear from whenyou were a kid... that might not go over toowell).
It's really up to you.
The key is to use these things sparingly, anduse them with the concepts that you've alreadylearned to AMPLIFY THE ATTRACTION that you'vealready created with your COMMUNICATION.
So remember, use these things with women whoare ALREADY feeling the attraction, not to createit!
So... you like what you're hearing?
So... you want to learn more?
So... you want to learn how to take control ofthis entire area of romance and sexuality withwomen?
My newest program is called "Power Sexuality".
I waited a long time to create this program. Itwas an intense project.
After several years of teaching guys how to bemore successful with women and dating, I realizedthat there was a kind of "root problem" that wasat the heart of many challenges men face.
Some men will describe this problem as a lackof "Sexual Confidence".
And it's more than just not knowing what to doin the bedroom.
It's about learning to get in touch with thatpart of yourself that's been "pushed down" for somany years... and to enjoy it.
If you would like to learn more about how to bea guy that really triggers the sexual ANIMALinside of a woman, then you need to check thisprogram out.
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Talk to you soon.
Your Friend,
David D.
P.S. Take a few minutes and browse through all ofthe other programs I've created to help you learnhow to meet and attract women. You can see themall here:
http://www.DatingTechniques.com/Catalog