Thursday, May 31, 2007
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Thursday, May 24, 2007
The Ten Reasons/Mistakes Why HIGHLY INTELLIGENT Men FAIL With Women... AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT...
I've been teaching men how to become more successful with women and dating for several yearsnow... and one "problem scenario" just keepscoming up OVER AND OVER... and OVER and OVER andOVER again... ...and it really amazes me. I'm going to refer to it as "The Genius FailureParadox". "The Genius Failure Paradox" is the tendencyfor UNUSUALLY intelligent men to have very LOW levels of success with women and dating.
After contemplating this particular paradox,discussing it, and working on it for an awesomeamount of time, I'd like to share my thoughtsabout it with you. I assume that if you've read this far, then youprobably see yourself as smarter than the averageguy. You know that you're a little different thanother guys. You probably realized at a young age that yousaw things differently and thought differentlythan others in school... And you've probably realized that your smart mind gives you an advantage over others in manyareas of life... Your smart mind gives you a particular type of advantage that can be very, very powerful in life:
YOU'RE USUALLY RIGHT.
Smart people get used to being "right" becausethey usually ARE right. And when you're RIGHT more often than others,you can get ahead in many situations. But unfortunately, this smart mind of yours canactually be WORSE than USELESS when it comes to akey area of life: WOMEN AND DATING. By the way, I did say WORSE than useless. It can actually be like having a hammer whenyou need to tighten a bolt. If you use the tool you have for the job, you'll most likely make the situation WORSE.
Of course, it's hard for a smart guy to even IMAGINE a situation where his smart mind could HURT his chances for success... But trust me, this is one of those situations. So relax, open your smart mind, and let meshare with you the ten reasons why smart guys failwith women... and what to do about it.
REASON #1: THEY'RE WRONG, BUT THEY CAN'T OR WON'T SEE IT OR ADMIT IT. I mentioned that smart guys are used to beingRIGHT in most situations. And what do most smart guys do when they comeacross a situation where they're WRONG? They find a new situation... one that fitstheir strength. They know they'll be right nexttime, so they just walk away... knowing that itwon't be long before they're right again. (OR they let the "problem situation" destroythem... more on that later.) Well, the BITCH about being wrong when it comesto women and dating is THERE'S NOWHERE TO RUN ANDHIDE. There's no quick "I'm right" around the nextcorner to make you feel better. It only takes "failing" with a few women in arow for a smart guy to see the pattern... andrealize that something isn't working. Solution? Think harder. A smart guy just assumes that his logic must begood... so he just keeps thinking harder. But when no success comes, it really starts tobecome mentally difficult. Accepting that you're wrong is a VERY hardthing for a "smart guy" to do. Accepting that you're not only wrong, but youhave NO CLUE WHERE TO EVEN START is even moredifficult. Ultimately, many smart guys come up with thefollowing logical conclusion:I AM A SMART GUY, THEREFORE IF I CAN'T FIGURE OUTHOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN AND DATING, THENTHE PROBLEM MUST NOT BE SOLVABLE OR WORTH SOLVING. Try that on for a self-defeating idea.REASON
#2: THEY'RE BLIND AND ARROGANT. In short, many smart guys refuse to accept thata good, solid, workable answer could come fromsomeone "dumber" than them, so they discount anyidea that comes from an "obviously lessintelligent person" before trying it. Let me ask you a question: If you were going to be walking across Africaon foot, would you rather have your guide be theguy on this planet with the highest I.Q., or acaveman who lived a million years ago that had anI.Q. of about 50... but who grew up being chasedby lions and all kinds of animals that wanted toeat him all his life? It's an interesting question. Now, hopefully you'd like to have the guide whoisn't the smartest guy around... but who hasescaped from many, many dangerous situations withdeadly animals... But now let me ask you: If you'd like to learn how to be moresuccessful with women and dating, would you takeadvice from a guy who isn't very intelligent, butwho knows how to attract women? There's something about being smart that makessome guys unwilling to accept input, ideas, orinstruction from anyone who isn't either as smartor smarter than them. Well, any SMART GUY can see the folly in thisparticular approach... once it's examined closely. If you've been making this mistake, then youneed to STOP IT. Stop being an arrogant bastard,and open your eyes. Look around. Learn from some "dumb" guys... and let themteach you how to get what you REALLY want.REASON
#3: POOR SOCIAL SKILLS. It BLOWS MY MIND how many smart guys I meetthat just don't GET IT when it comes to basicsocial skills. It's as if they have logically reasoned thatsocial skills are for lower beings who need toplay games... and not worth the time it would taketo learn them. In fact, I believe that there are a lot ofsmart guys running around this planet who don'teven have "social skills" and "be a cool guy thatpeople like" in their MENTAL MODEL of what itcould possibly take to be successful with womenand dating. Social skills are just that... SKILLS. They're not social INFORMATION. They're not social THEORIES. They're social SKILLS. And you don't get them by THINKING about them.You get them by GETTING them. Excellent social skills are the foundation forgood communication with other humans... and if youdon't have good social skills, you dramaticallylower your chances for success with women.REASON
#4: THEY PSYCH THEMSELVES OUT. Smart guys do something that fascinates thehell out of me... They come up with all the reasons whyeverything WON'T WORK when it comes to women anddating. They actually figure out why what it is thatthey would like to do will probably fail... They use their amazing creative imaginations toimagine all kinds of horrible pictures andscenes... and then they use those imaginaryoutcomes to create negative emotions... whichultimately stop them from having success withwomen and dating. THEY DON'T EVEN TRY. Now, if you've thought something through andcome up with a good reason why it would fail, itmakes sense to not do it, right? I mean, why would you want to do things thatare going to fail? It is sound logic, but HORRIBLE thinking whenit comes to the REAL WORLD... and success withwomen. Because smart guys don't UNDERSTAND women, andthey don't UNDERSTAND what it takes to besuccessful with women, they are working with badfigures. They're wrong before they even startfiguring! Using your mind to come up with all the reasonswhy things won't work in this area of your lifeleads to ULTIMATE FAILURE. You must learn to overcome this habit if youhave it.
REASON #5: THEY SEEK ONLY "INFORMATIONAL SOLUTIONS" What does a smart guy do when he runs into aproblem... or he needs to figure something out? He looks for INFORMATION to help him solve theproblem. MORE INFORMATION is always the answer. Information is the friend of a smart guy. Got a strange virus on your computer? Just hopon the Internet and search for how to eliminateit. Don't know how to change the alternator on yourcar? No prob. Just buy the manual and turn to page147. Don't know the definition of a word? Open upyour dictionary. MORE INFORMATION solves the problem. So what do smart guys do when it comes toovercoming a problem with women? They want MORE INFORMATION. They think the answer lies in learning just ONEMORE TECHNIQUE... or one more magic concept. Well what if there were a situation in lifewhere the "get more information" strategy actuallymade things WORSE? How would you even know that it was makingthings worse? Now, I don't want to suggest that learning moreabout how to be successful with women is a badthing. It's not. But if you have a problem that is EMOTIONAL orPHYSICAL in nature, then reading five milliontheories on it probably isn't going to help youvery much. You need to get out in the real world and trysome stuff! You need to look at the REAL problem... theROOT of the problem. When it comes to women and dating, there's avery good chance that you have MORE than enough"information". Smart guys often use "more information" todistract them from TAKING ACTION. I've heard this referred to as "CreativeAvoidance". Nod silently if you've ever figured out acreative way to avoid facing something in yourlife. Good, thank you.
REASON #6: THEY FOCUS ON LOGIC INSTEAD OF EMOTION. NEWS JUST IN: Women don't feel ATTRACTION formen who make them THINK. Women feel ATTRACTION for men who make themFEEL. So what do most smart guys do when they firstmeet a woman? EXACTLY! They get into a LOGICAL CONVERSATION. I'm shaking my head right now... Smart men try to engage women in LOGICALconversations and interactions because that'swhere THEY feel comfortable... not knowing thatthey're SHOOTING THEMSELVES IN THE FOOT by doingit! Get this: A monkey sitting at a typewriter willtype the collected works of Shakespeare before youwill make a woman feel ATTRACTION for you byengaging her in logical conversation. When you start a logical conversation with awoman you've just met, you are basically takingout a NEON SIGN that says, "I don't get it when itcomes to women" and putting it on your head. Typical "logical" conversations include talkingabout work, family, school, and jobs... discussingpolitics, religion, weather... and anything thathas to do with math, science, or INTELLIGENCE. On the other hand, if you start talking to awoman and you say, "OK, so tell me something...Why is it that all women say that they want sweet,nice guys... but they all date sexy, selfish, badboys?" (and then make fun of any answer she gives)Now you're having an EMOTIONAL conversation. If you don't know what I'm talking about, keepreading. You need more help than I thought. IMPORTANT NOTE: If you just read this section,and you can identify with what I'm talking about,then I highly recommend that you go to this page:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/SexualCommunication/?cid=VHMZZZ&lid=2&ll=1
REASON #7: THEY'RE NOT USED TO THE CHALLENGE OFTHE MOMENT Smart people usually have time to THINK aboutthings. If you're taking a test, you can sit there andwork out the answers. If you have a math problem, you can work on ituntil you've figured it out. If you're trying to fix something, you can keepworking on it until it's fixed. Smart guys are used to being able to take atleast a LITTLE bit of time to prepare and show offtheir "good sides" in most situations. Not so with women... If you don't know what to do at every stepalong the way, you'll be shut down very quickly. Women have an AMAZING "He doesn't get it" radarsystem. Women have all kinds of subtle and ingenioustests that they throw at men to separate the "getits" from the "don't get its". And if you don't get it, then you're going tofail one of these tests VERY quickly. But the worst part is that you won't ever KNOWthat you were being tested... OR that you failed. Smart guys aren't used to dealing with complexEMOTIONAL and COMMUNICATION challenges in themoment... and especially the "women and dating"kind. One of they keys to becoming more successfulwith women and dating is learning to handle all ofthe tests that women throw at you effortlessly. But before you can learn how to deal with thetests, you must first learn how to communicate onan emotional level, how to demonstrate that youhave fundamental social skills, and how to keepyour cool in the moment.
REASON #8: THEY THINK THAT DOING "NICE" THINGS IS THE "SMART WAY" OK, let me ask you a trick question: If I told you that you were going to have adate with the super model of your choice, which ofthe following would you choose as a "smart" way ofpreparing:1) Find out what her favorite type of flowers are,and show up with a dozen of them so she would be"wowed".2) Learn about her favorite travel destination soyou could discuss it with her.3) Find out what her favorite type of food is soyou could take her to dinner... and she could seethat you cared enough to choose something that sheenjoyed. OK, time's up. Which did you choose? Now, I already mentioned that this was a TRICKquestion. The answer is NONE OF THE ABOVE. But WHY? These three options all seemed logical, right? I mean, why WOULDN'T you want to show up withher favorite flowers? Why WOULDN'T you want to talk about to herabout her favorite places to travel? Why WOULDN'T you want to take her to eat herfavorite foods so she enjoyed herself? Go with me here... Smart guys think that they're being CLEVER whenthey do things like buying a woman her favoriteflowers... and bringing them to the FIRST DATE. Right? In their minds they're thinking, "I'm going tobe the guy who is thinking ahead... and I'm goingto show up with the flowers that I KNOW sheloves... and she's going to see them and like memore because of it". Makes sense... good math, right? Well the one teensy-weensy mistake that these"smart" guys make is not realizing that it doesn'tactually take a smart person to think like this! In fact, ANY jackass can figure out how to kissa woman's ass. And guess what? WOMEN KNOW THIS! And guess what else? EVERY WUSSBAG DOES THIS STUFF. An intelligent guy, in his proud arrogance,will think he's being such the charmer by usingthis "thoughtful" approach... ...and the woman he is chasing will interpretit as just another Wussy who's trying toMANIPULATE her. Ouch. Another blow to intelligence.
MISTAKE #9: THEY ALWAYS NEED TO BE THE EXPERT Have you ever met a smart guy who always neededto be "right"? Have you ever met someone who would actuallyargue with you about something they knew nothingabout... and make a fool of themselves becausethey just couldn't shut their "smart mouths"? Over the last few years helping guys improvetheir success with women, I see this one patternover and over again... Smart guys don't like to be "beginners" atANYTHING. They don't like the idea of screwing up...especially if others are watching. They want to maintain this "smart guy" image ofthemselves... so they try to always be "TheExpert" at whatever they do. Instead of saying, "Hey, you know what? I'm abeginner at this... how do I do it? What should Ido first? What next?"... and instead of beingtotally OK with screwing up, making mistakes, andmaking a fool of themselves in front of others inorder to LEARN... ...they won't risk embarrassment, failure, orothers thinking that they're beginners... so theywind up ultimately FAILING. MORE NEWS JUST IN: It's OK to be a beginner.
MISTAKE #10: THEY CAN'T DEAL WITH FEAR AND OTHER EMOTIONS A smart guy's STRENGTH is his MIND. His WEAKNESS is often his EMOTIONS. Smart guys are often IMMOBILIZED by FEAR. Totally stopped. FROZEN. And since many smart guys aren't comfortabledealing with things they're not good at, they justrepress or RUN away from fear. Many men would rather DIE in lonely isolationthan admit that they don't know how to deal withtheir emotions... or, GOD FORBID, ask for help! Hey, I went for YEARS like this. I know what it's like. But the reality is that any guy can learn tohandle and even MASTER his emotions (even fear)...if he just takes the time and effort to learn HOWto do it. If this is you, then do yourself a big favor...take the time. Take the effort. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks ofyou... it doesn't matter. What matters is you doing the things that YOUneed to do FOR YOU. ...I think the reason why I'm so fascinatedwith "The Genius Failure Paradox" is because Ihave had to struggle with all of these issues fora lot of years of my life. Now, I'm not saying that I'm the smartest guyon the planet... But, I don't think mamma raised no fool. And it always bothered the hell out of me thateven though I was so good at figuring things out,I couldn't figure WOMEN out. Something tells me that you know what I'mtalking about. Well, after beating my head against the wallfor a few years... trying all kinds of crazy"logical" stuff... I finally got the "bright" ideato start studying guys who were "naturally" goodwith women. Of course, I found out that you could be both NOT SMART and VERY SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN at the same time.
I also learned that you can be SMART and VERY SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN too. By carefully studying what the "naturals" didwith women... and learning how they "thought"about the topic, I began to realize that successwith women wasn't entirely LOGICAL. Much of what I learned was very tough for me toaccept... because my logical brain just didn'twant to buy into it. One thing I saw was guys pushing women awayfrom them... and having the women then chase themin response. Made no sense at all. I saw guys tease beautiful women and make jokesabout them to their faces... and then watchedthose women become "little girls" in response...unable to maintain their composure and thereforeunable to maintain their manipulative power... It took me quite a long time, but I continuedto learn, test, and refine what I was learninguntil I personally figured out how to approachwomen in any situation... get any woman's number Iwanted anytime I wanted... date any type of womanI wanted... ...and most importantly, GET RID of that"empty" feeling that I carried around my wholelife because I didn't know how to attract women. And once I got this area of my own lifetogether, I decided to help other guys get thisarea of THEIR lives together. The first "major" result of all this time,effort, and energy is my Advanced DatingTechniques CD/DVD Program. It's over 12 full hours of me personallyteaching all of my very best concepts, secrets,and step-by-step techniques... recorded at aspecial 3-day live program I did just for thispurpose. You not only get to learn directly from me, butyou also get to see and/or hear from many of theguys that I learned from... because they're guestson the program. As a matter of fact, the guest interviews aloneare priceless.
If you're ready to finally get this area ofyour life "figured out", then you need to getyourself a copy of this program. All the details, plus some great audio andvideo sample clips are here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/AdvancedSeries/?cid=VHMZZZ&lid=3&ll=1
I've been teaching men how to become more successful with women and dating for several yearsnow... and one "problem scenario" just keepscoming up OVER AND OVER... and OVER and OVER andOVER again... ...and it really amazes me. I'm going to refer to it as "The Genius FailureParadox". "The Genius Failure Paradox" is the tendencyfor UNUSUALLY intelligent men to have very LOW levels of success with women and dating.
After contemplating this particular paradox,discussing it, and working on it for an awesomeamount of time, I'd like to share my thoughtsabout it with you. I assume that if you've read this far, then youprobably see yourself as smarter than the averageguy. You know that you're a little different thanother guys. You probably realized at a young age that yousaw things differently and thought differentlythan others in school... And you've probably realized that your smart mind gives you an advantage over others in manyareas of life... Your smart mind gives you a particular type of advantage that can be very, very powerful in life:
YOU'RE USUALLY RIGHT.
Smart people get used to being "right" becausethey usually ARE right. And when you're RIGHT more often than others,you can get ahead in many situations. But unfortunately, this smart mind of yours canactually be WORSE than USELESS when it comes to akey area of life: WOMEN AND DATING. By the way, I did say WORSE than useless. It can actually be like having a hammer whenyou need to tighten a bolt. If you use the tool you have for the job, you'll most likely make the situation WORSE.
Of course, it's hard for a smart guy to even IMAGINE a situation where his smart mind could HURT his chances for success... But trust me, this is one of those situations. So relax, open your smart mind, and let meshare with you the ten reasons why smart guys failwith women... and what to do about it.
REASON #1: THEY'RE WRONG, BUT THEY CAN'T OR WON'T SEE IT OR ADMIT IT. I mentioned that smart guys are used to beingRIGHT in most situations. And what do most smart guys do when they comeacross a situation where they're WRONG? They find a new situation... one that fitstheir strength. They know they'll be right nexttime, so they just walk away... knowing that itwon't be long before they're right again. (OR they let the "problem situation" destroythem... more on that later.) Well, the BITCH about being wrong when it comesto women and dating is THERE'S NOWHERE TO RUN ANDHIDE. There's no quick "I'm right" around the nextcorner to make you feel better. It only takes "failing" with a few women in arow for a smart guy to see the pattern... andrealize that something isn't working. Solution? Think harder. A smart guy just assumes that his logic must begood... so he just keeps thinking harder. But when no success comes, it really starts tobecome mentally difficult. Accepting that you're wrong is a VERY hardthing for a "smart guy" to do. Accepting that you're not only wrong, but youhave NO CLUE WHERE TO EVEN START is even moredifficult. Ultimately, many smart guys come up with thefollowing logical conclusion:I AM A SMART GUY, THEREFORE IF I CAN'T FIGURE OUTHOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN AND DATING, THENTHE PROBLEM MUST NOT BE SOLVABLE OR WORTH SOLVING. Try that on for a self-defeating idea.REASON
#2: THEY'RE BLIND AND ARROGANT. In short, many smart guys refuse to accept thata good, solid, workable answer could come fromsomeone "dumber" than them, so they discount anyidea that comes from an "obviously lessintelligent person" before trying it. Let me ask you a question: If you were going to be walking across Africaon foot, would you rather have your guide be theguy on this planet with the highest I.Q., or acaveman who lived a million years ago that had anI.Q. of about 50... but who grew up being chasedby lions and all kinds of animals that wanted toeat him all his life? It's an interesting question. Now, hopefully you'd like to have the guide whoisn't the smartest guy around... but who hasescaped from many, many dangerous situations withdeadly animals... But now let me ask you: If you'd like to learn how to be moresuccessful with women and dating, would you takeadvice from a guy who isn't very intelligent, butwho knows how to attract women? There's something about being smart that makessome guys unwilling to accept input, ideas, orinstruction from anyone who isn't either as smartor smarter than them. Well, any SMART GUY can see the folly in thisparticular approach... once it's examined closely. If you've been making this mistake, then youneed to STOP IT. Stop being an arrogant bastard,and open your eyes. Look around. Learn from some "dumb" guys... and let themteach you how to get what you REALLY want.REASON
#3: POOR SOCIAL SKILLS. It BLOWS MY MIND how many smart guys I meetthat just don't GET IT when it comes to basicsocial skills. It's as if they have logically reasoned thatsocial skills are for lower beings who need toplay games... and not worth the time it would taketo learn them. In fact, I believe that there are a lot ofsmart guys running around this planet who don'teven have "social skills" and "be a cool guy thatpeople like" in their MENTAL MODEL of what itcould possibly take to be successful with womenand dating. Social skills are just that... SKILLS. They're not social INFORMATION. They're not social THEORIES. They're social SKILLS. And you don't get them by THINKING about them.You get them by GETTING them. Excellent social skills are the foundation forgood communication with other humans... and if youdon't have good social skills, you dramaticallylower your chances for success with women.REASON
#4: THEY PSYCH THEMSELVES OUT. Smart guys do something that fascinates thehell out of me... They come up with all the reasons whyeverything WON'T WORK when it comes to women anddating. They actually figure out why what it is thatthey would like to do will probably fail... They use their amazing creative imaginations toimagine all kinds of horrible pictures andscenes... and then they use those imaginaryoutcomes to create negative emotions... whichultimately stop them from having success withwomen and dating. THEY DON'T EVEN TRY. Now, if you've thought something through andcome up with a good reason why it would fail, itmakes sense to not do it, right? I mean, why would you want to do things thatare going to fail? It is sound logic, but HORRIBLE thinking whenit comes to the REAL WORLD... and success withwomen. Because smart guys don't UNDERSTAND women, andthey don't UNDERSTAND what it takes to besuccessful with women, they are working with badfigures. They're wrong before they even startfiguring! Using your mind to come up with all the reasonswhy things won't work in this area of your lifeleads to ULTIMATE FAILURE. You must learn to overcome this habit if youhave it.
REASON #5: THEY SEEK ONLY "INFORMATIONAL SOLUTIONS" What does a smart guy do when he runs into aproblem... or he needs to figure something out? He looks for INFORMATION to help him solve theproblem. MORE INFORMATION is always the answer. Information is the friend of a smart guy. Got a strange virus on your computer? Just hopon the Internet and search for how to eliminateit. Don't know how to change the alternator on yourcar? No prob. Just buy the manual and turn to page147. Don't know the definition of a word? Open upyour dictionary. MORE INFORMATION solves the problem. So what do smart guys do when it comes toovercoming a problem with women? They want MORE INFORMATION. They think the answer lies in learning just ONEMORE TECHNIQUE... or one more magic concept. Well what if there were a situation in lifewhere the "get more information" strategy actuallymade things WORSE? How would you even know that it was makingthings worse? Now, I don't want to suggest that learning moreabout how to be successful with women is a badthing. It's not. But if you have a problem that is EMOTIONAL orPHYSICAL in nature, then reading five milliontheories on it probably isn't going to help youvery much. You need to get out in the real world and trysome stuff! You need to look at the REAL problem... theROOT of the problem. When it comes to women and dating, there's avery good chance that you have MORE than enough"information". Smart guys often use "more information" todistract them from TAKING ACTION. I've heard this referred to as "CreativeAvoidance". Nod silently if you've ever figured out acreative way to avoid facing something in yourlife. Good, thank you.
REASON #6: THEY FOCUS ON LOGIC INSTEAD OF EMOTION. NEWS JUST IN: Women don't feel ATTRACTION formen who make them THINK. Women feel ATTRACTION for men who make themFEEL. So what do most smart guys do when they firstmeet a woman? EXACTLY! They get into a LOGICAL CONVERSATION. I'm shaking my head right now... Smart men try to engage women in LOGICALconversations and interactions because that'swhere THEY feel comfortable... not knowing thatthey're SHOOTING THEMSELVES IN THE FOOT by doingit! Get this: A monkey sitting at a typewriter willtype the collected works of Shakespeare before youwill make a woman feel ATTRACTION for you byengaging her in logical conversation. When you start a logical conversation with awoman you've just met, you are basically takingout a NEON SIGN that says, "I don't get it when itcomes to women" and putting it on your head. Typical "logical" conversations include talkingabout work, family, school, and jobs... discussingpolitics, religion, weather... and anything thathas to do with math, science, or INTELLIGENCE. On the other hand, if you start talking to awoman and you say, "OK, so tell me something...Why is it that all women say that they want sweet,nice guys... but they all date sexy, selfish, badboys?" (and then make fun of any answer she gives)Now you're having an EMOTIONAL conversation. If you don't know what I'm talking about, keepreading. You need more help than I thought. IMPORTANT NOTE: If you just read this section,and you can identify with what I'm talking about,then I highly recommend that you go to this page:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/SexualCommunication/?cid=VHMZZZ&lid=2&ll=1
REASON #7: THEY'RE NOT USED TO THE CHALLENGE OFTHE MOMENT Smart people usually have time to THINK aboutthings. If you're taking a test, you can sit there andwork out the answers. If you have a math problem, you can work on ituntil you've figured it out. If you're trying to fix something, you can keepworking on it until it's fixed. Smart guys are used to being able to take atleast a LITTLE bit of time to prepare and show offtheir "good sides" in most situations. Not so with women... If you don't know what to do at every stepalong the way, you'll be shut down very quickly. Women have an AMAZING "He doesn't get it" radarsystem. Women have all kinds of subtle and ingenioustests that they throw at men to separate the "getits" from the "don't get its". And if you don't get it, then you're going tofail one of these tests VERY quickly. But the worst part is that you won't ever KNOWthat you were being tested... OR that you failed. Smart guys aren't used to dealing with complexEMOTIONAL and COMMUNICATION challenges in themoment... and especially the "women and dating"kind. One of they keys to becoming more successfulwith women and dating is learning to handle all ofthe tests that women throw at you effortlessly. But before you can learn how to deal with thetests, you must first learn how to communicate onan emotional level, how to demonstrate that youhave fundamental social skills, and how to keepyour cool in the moment.
REASON #8: THEY THINK THAT DOING "NICE" THINGS IS THE "SMART WAY" OK, let me ask you a trick question: If I told you that you were going to have adate with the super model of your choice, which ofthe following would you choose as a "smart" way ofpreparing:1) Find out what her favorite type of flowers are,and show up with a dozen of them so she would be"wowed".2) Learn about her favorite travel destination soyou could discuss it with her.3) Find out what her favorite type of food is soyou could take her to dinner... and she could seethat you cared enough to choose something that sheenjoyed. OK, time's up. Which did you choose? Now, I already mentioned that this was a TRICKquestion. The answer is NONE OF THE ABOVE. But WHY? These three options all seemed logical, right? I mean, why WOULDN'T you want to show up withher favorite flowers? Why WOULDN'T you want to talk about to herabout her favorite places to travel? Why WOULDN'T you want to take her to eat herfavorite foods so she enjoyed herself? Go with me here... Smart guys think that they're being CLEVER whenthey do things like buying a woman her favoriteflowers... and bringing them to the FIRST DATE. Right? In their minds they're thinking, "I'm going tobe the guy who is thinking ahead... and I'm goingto show up with the flowers that I KNOW sheloves... and she's going to see them and like memore because of it". Makes sense... good math, right? Well the one teensy-weensy mistake that these"smart" guys make is not realizing that it doesn'tactually take a smart person to think like this! In fact, ANY jackass can figure out how to kissa woman's ass. And guess what? WOMEN KNOW THIS! And guess what else? EVERY WUSSBAG DOES THIS STUFF. An intelligent guy, in his proud arrogance,will think he's being such the charmer by usingthis "thoughtful" approach... ...and the woman he is chasing will interpretit as just another Wussy who's trying toMANIPULATE her. Ouch. Another blow to intelligence.
MISTAKE #9: THEY ALWAYS NEED TO BE THE EXPERT Have you ever met a smart guy who always neededto be "right"? Have you ever met someone who would actuallyargue with you about something they knew nothingabout... and make a fool of themselves becausethey just couldn't shut their "smart mouths"? Over the last few years helping guys improvetheir success with women, I see this one patternover and over again... Smart guys don't like to be "beginners" atANYTHING. They don't like the idea of screwing up...especially if others are watching. They want to maintain this "smart guy" image ofthemselves... so they try to always be "TheExpert" at whatever they do. Instead of saying, "Hey, you know what? I'm abeginner at this... how do I do it? What should Ido first? What next?"... and instead of beingtotally OK with screwing up, making mistakes, andmaking a fool of themselves in front of others inorder to LEARN... ...they won't risk embarrassment, failure, orothers thinking that they're beginners... so theywind up ultimately FAILING. MORE NEWS JUST IN: It's OK to be a beginner.
MISTAKE #10: THEY CAN'T DEAL WITH FEAR AND OTHER EMOTIONS A smart guy's STRENGTH is his MIND. His WEAKNESS is often his EMOTIONS. Smart guys are often IMMOBILIZED by FEAR. Totally stopped. FROZEN. And since many smart guys aren't comfortabledealing with things they're not good at, they justrepress or RUN away from fear. Many men would rather DIE in lonely isolationthan admit that they don't know how to deal withtheir emotions... or, GOD FORBID, ask for help! Hey, I went for YEARS like this. I know what it's like. But the reality is that any guy can learn tohandle and even MASTER his emotions (even fear)...if he just takes the time and effort to learn HOWto do it. If this is you, then do yourself a big favor...take the time. Take the effort. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks ofyou... it doesn't matter. What matters is you doing the things that YOUneed to do FOR YOU. ...I think the reason why I'm so fascinatedwith "The Genius Failure Paradox" is because Ihave had to struggle with all of these issues fora lot of years of my life. Now, I'm not saying that I'm the smartest guyon the planet... But, I don't think mamma raised no fool. And it always bothered the hell out of me thateven though I was so good at figuring things out,I couldn't figure WOMEN out. Something tells me that you know what I'mtalking about. Well, after beating my head against the wallfor a few years... trying all kinds of crazy"logical" stuff... I finally got the "bright" ideato start studying guys who were "naturally" goodwith women. Of course, I found out that you could be both NOT SMART and VERY SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN at the same time.
I also learned that you can be SMART and VERY SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN too. By carefully studying what the "naturals" didwith women... and learning how they "thought"about the topic, I began to realize that successwith women wasn't entirely LOGICAL. Much of what I learned was very tough for me toaccept... because my logical brain just didn'twant to buy into it. One thing I saw was guys pushing women awayfrom them... and having the women then chase themin response. Made no sense at all. I saw guys tease beautiful women and make jokesabout them to their faces... and then watchedthose women become "little girls" in response...unable to maintain their composure and thereforeunable to maintain their manipulative power... It took me quite a long time, but I continuedto learn, test, and refine what I was learninguntil I personally figured out how to approachwomen in any situation... get any woman's number Iwanted anytime I wanted... date any type of womanI wanted... ...and most importantly, GET RID of that"empty" feeling that I carried around my wholelife because I didn't know how to attract women. And once I got this area of my own lifetogether, I decided to help other guys get thisarea of THEIR lives together. The first "major" result of all this time,effort, and energy is my Advanced DatingTechniques CD/DVD Program. It's over 12 full hours of me personallyteaching all of my very best concepts, secrets,and step-by-step techniques... recorded at aspecial 3-day live program I did just for thispurpose. You not only get to learn directly from me, butyou also get to see and/or hear from many of theguys that I learned from... because they're guestson the program. As a matter of fact, the guest interviews aloneare priceless.
If you're ready to finally get this area ofyour life "figured out", then you need to getyourself a copy of this program. All the details, plus some great audio andvideo sample clips are here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/AdvancedSeries/?cid=VHMZZZ&lid=3&ll=1
Saturday, May 19, 2007
If you ever hear a woman say the words, "He'snice", you can pull out all the money you have onyou and bet that she's not ATTRACTED to the guyshe's talking about. Women don't use the word "Nice" to describe menthat they're FEELING it for. So, why would you want to use the "usual niceguy routine"? What? You want to make SURE shenever feels anything other than friendship foryou? Hmmmmm. What you're telling me here is that you knewthis super-babe four years ago, but the "nice guy"rap didn't make anything happen then... so you'rethinking that if you pour it on twice as thick, itmight work better this time? Hmmmmm. Here's a good rule of thumb: If your behavior isn't getting you theconsistent results that you'd like to get, CHANGEIT. Do ANYTHING different. I'm serious here. If what you're doing isn't working, DOSOMETHING ELSE IMMEDIATELY! And, if you've FOUND SOMETHING that works, thenKEEP DOING IT! (Hint: In case you haven't figured it out, Ithink you should ix-nay the ice-nay uy-gay outine-ray.) And, I don't think it's a coincidence that thewords "nice guy" translate into "ICE-NAY UY-GAY"in Pig Latin. Read that again, because it was pretty funny. In summary, I think you might want to stickwith the cocky & funny personality. It's workingfor more than a few guys out there, and it canwork for you (as you've seen). Also, it sounds like you could use a STRONGdose of a type of medicine that you can ONLY getby going HERE... and I'm not kidding, so check itout:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/OnBeingAMan/?cid=ZZVHLZ&lid=2&ll=1 On a side topic... From the way I talk, you might start to get theidea that I'm against being nice to women. Quite the contrary. I think that it's great to be nice to women. Just do it in a way that doesn't make themthink of you as a "nice guy." Oh, that sounds interesting. So, the question is: How can I be nice withoutmaking her see me as a super-wussy who would pay ahundred dollars just to have one quick dig throughher dresser? I just figured out how to say this in a simple,concise way... so listen up: BE COCKY & FUNNY, AND BUST HER BALLS WITH YOURWORDS, BUT BE NICE TO HER WITH YOUR BEHAVIOR. Wow, that was cool. Nice and simple. So, here are a few examples:1) Tell her that she walks slower than your mom,then open all doors for her.2) Tell her that she's too uptight and she needsto settle down because it's annoying, then rub hershoulders.3) Give her a hard time about her driving, thenkiss her. Are you with me? One of the concepts that I talk about in mybook, "Double Your Dating", is ALWAYS SEND MIXEDMESSAGES. Why would you want to send mixed messages? Because it's interesting. Because if it's done right, it's attractive. Because attractive women are fascinated by itwhen it's mixed with a cocky & funny personality. I hope that those reasons work for you. Attractive women are sooooo over guys who kissup to them, buy them things, take them out, andact "nice". Attractive women are looking for somethingdifferent. A challenge. A spark. Sassy, cheeky, mouthy,ballsy, witty, charming. An unpredictable, funnyguy like yourself to take her attention, and runwith it. Now, how unpredictable is "nice"? How much of achallenge is "nice"? How much of a spark is in"nice"? Exactly. Not much. So, in summary: Be nice... but do it on yourown terms. And mix nice BEHAVIOR with COCKY &FUNNY COMMUNICATION. This magical combination will keep her interestfor as long as you'd like to have it. Remember, attractive women are different. Theyknow that they can have anything they want. SODON'T GIVE IT TO THEM... and they'll love you. Does this sound "counterintuitive" to you? Good. It is. And it works like gangbusters. Remember this: You need to understand how ATTRACTION works forwomen and you need to do those things that keepthe ATTRACTION BUILDING FOREVER. Now, where does this all begin? It begins with YOU. And, it begins with you learning how to controlyourself and your emotions. It begins with youneeding to understand the history of how and whymen and women become attracted to each other. Itbegins with you learning the basics of how to usesubtle body language and communication to makewomen feel ATTRACTION for you. I really believe that there's more than meetsthe eye when it comes to success with women anddating. The process that creates the magic emotion ofATTRACTION is mysterious, seemingly illogical, and"counterintuitive". If you don't understand it,then it just won't make sense. It's taken me literally YEARS to be able toboth attract women AND be able to EXPLAIN how todo it. My newest book, "Attraction Isn't A Choice", isthe most detailed, in-depth explanation ofattraction available ANYWHERE... and it will takeyou "behind the scenes" of the female "attractionmechanism" and teach you how to create attractionusing only your personality and communication...no money or gifts required. You can go and download it right now, and bereading it within just a few minutes. Go get ithere:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/AttractionBook/?cid=ZZVHLZ&lid=3&ll=1 And, if you find it hard to imagine yourselfbeing able to attract a woman using just yourCOMMUNICATION... and you would like to learn theMAGIC skill of using my favorite technique I call"Cocky & Funny", then you need to go and check outmy Cocky Comedy CD/DVD program. You'll get a TON of ideas just by watching thesample video clips on the website, so go check itout... watch the preview clips, and read all aboutit here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/CockyComedy/?cid=ZZVHLZ&lid=4&ll=1 Go check them out. And I'll talk to you again soon. Your Friend, David D.P.S. Do NOT forget to look at the other programsI've created to teach you about all of the manyfacets of learning to attract women. You can lookat all of them anytime you want right here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/Catalog/?cid=ZZVHLZ&lid=5&ll=1
Thursday, May 17, 2007
~~~ Tips of the Week ~~~
Make love on top of or leaning next to the washing machine while it is
on the spin cycle.
}{}{}{}{
Get undressed and sit facing each other with legs wrapped around.
Lean together with your two foreheads touching. Close your eyes and
feel each others breath and heartbeat. Put your hands on each others
heart if you cant feel the beating through the head.
}{}{}{}{
If youre making love and the phone rings, DO NOT pick it up. If you
do pick it up, it tells your partner that the person on the phone (or
at the door) is moreimportant than the intimacy you are sharing.
... and find out which position will make you feel almost
two inches bigger http://www.theromantic.com/small.htm
~~~ Other ezines ~~~
Sign up for Michael's other newsletters
Romantic Tip of the Week
Send a blank email to -- romantic-on@mail-list.com
Secrets of Blissful Relationships (monthly)
Send a blank email to -- secrets-on@mail-list.com
Or sign up for both at http://www.TheRomantic.com/
Make love on top of or leaning next to the washing machine while it is
on the spin cycle.
}{}{}{}{
Get undressed and sit facing each other with legs wrapped around.
Lean together with your two foreheads touching. Close your eyes and
feel each others breath and heartbeat. Put your hands on each others
heart if you cant feel the beating through the head.
}{}{}{}{
If youre making love and the phone rings, DO NOT pick it up. If you
do pick it up, it tells your partner that the person on the phone (or
at the door) is moreimportant than the intimacy you are sharing.
... and find out which position will make you feel almost
two inches bigger http://www.theromantic.com/small.htm
~~~ Other ezines ~~~
Sign up for Michael's other newsletters
Romantic Tip of the Week
Send a blank email to -- romantic-on@mail-list.com
Secrets of Blissful Relationships (monthly)
Send a blank email to -- secrets-on@mail-list.com
Or sign up for both at http://www.TheRomantic.com/
Friday, May 04, 2007
How Women "Test" Your Inner Wussy>NOTE: If you'd like to see a complete list of myprograms - all designed to help you attract andmeet women - just follow this link:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/Catalog/?cid=ZZVHZZ&lid=1&ll=1 Have you ever called a woman on the phone toset up a date and she says: "Friday night? Sure.Call me on Friday and we can talk about it..."? Or, have you ever had a woman ask you if you're"a player"? Or, have you ever had a woman challenge youabout something ridiculous? Or, have you ever had a woman call you fiveminutes before a date and cancel? Or, have you ever had a woman pout and getupset because she didn't get her way? Or, have you ever asked a woman for her numberand she says, "Why don't you give me your numberand I'll call YOU"? Well guess what... you were being TESTED. All of these are examples of common thingswomen do to "test" men. On some level, the woman you were dealing withwas testing to see how much control she had in therelationship... and how STRONG you were. The paradox of "testing" is that if you COMPLYwith what a woman SEEMS to want, you will usuallyFAIL the test. Hey, I never said that women made sense... lol. I was reading a great book recently called "TheWay Of The Superior Man", and inside the authorpoints out that a woman will often ask a man forsomething DIRECTLY... but if he DOES what sheasks, she will be disappointed and ANGRY with him. Ever been there? So what's with this testing stuff, anyway? Well, the answer is fascinating. And before I tell you about why women TEST you,I want to mention that there's a LOT more going on"behind the scenes" when it comes to femalepsychology and behavior. I believe that if you canlearn how to understand this "mating psychology",then you can learn to attract women MUCH faster... If you want to get some of my very best ideason this topic, just follow this link, and downloadmy online eBook "Double Your Dating"... it's here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/eBook/?cid=ZZVHZZ&lid=2&ll=1 Back to the answer... Women test men because they need to QUICKLYfigure out what they're dealing with, and theycan't expect a man to just be straight up andhonest about his strengths and weaknesses. I mean, let's face it... we guys like to talk abig game, but when it comes to walking the talk,we often can't BACK IT UP. Also, beautiful women have a lot of options.They have their pick of men. And beautiful womenprefer STRONG men. Not physically strong (althoughthis can be an advantage), but strong in CHARACTERand PERSONAL IDENTITY. Women aren't attracted to WUSSIES. So let me ask you... if you were an attractivewoman that was being chased around by 100 guys,how would YOU go about figuring out which one orones were the "real deal" and which were merelyFAKING strength and confidence? Of course... you'd have to TEST them. But you couldn't test by saying, "OK, I'm goingto give you a test now, so get ready". No no NO! You'd have to use "blind" tests. Tests thatwould allow you to see a man's true strengths andweaknesses. And in fact, you'd want to use teststhat ideally DIDN'T ALLOW HIM TO KNOW THAT YOUWERE TESTING... OR WHAT YOU HAD DISCOVERED ABOUTHIM WITH THOSE TESTS. This way, if he turned outto be a Wuss Bag, you could slip away quickly andeasily. This would give you the power... Of course. And if you did this OFTEN, you'd eventuallybecome so accustomed to doing it, that MANY of thetests would become SUBCONSCIOUS and work their wayinto your NATURAL, EVERYDAY way of communicatingwith men. Well guess what? That's what is going on with beautiful women. Many of the tests that they use with men areactually OUTSIDE OF THEIR AWARENESS. They test usautomatically! And if you fail one of these tests, there's agood chance that you won't get another chance. In this fast-paced world, we humans don't havethe time to spend getting to know people over afew months or years to figure out whether or notthey're the kind of person that would make a goodfriend or mate. We need to know NOW. So we use shortcuts. Testing is a shortcut for women. It lets them discover VERY RAPIDLY whether youhave BALLS, or if you're just another one of thebazillion Wusses that are trying to get herattention. I hope you feel what I'm saying. So, the next time you're standing in front of abeautiful woman who you've just asked for hernumber and she says, "Why don't you just give meyours and I'll call YOU..." try CHUCKLING outloud, and saying:"Oh, cummon. Don't give me that old line. Writeyour number down and I'll only call you 25 times aday until you wind up having to change it becauseI have nothing better to do with my time than callsomeone who doesn't want to hear from me." Then hand her a pen, point to the paper, andlook her in the eye expectantly. Love it. Now, obviously there's a lot more to this issueof TESTING. There's a lot more going on than meetsthe eye. There are all kinds of subtle cues and bodylanguage that women read to decide just what kindof man you are... and these cues also triggerATTRACTION (or the opposite). I've spent a lot of time researching thistopic, and figuring out exactly what makes womenfeel that powerful emotion called ATTRACTION, andwhat repels them instantly. If you'd like to get a POWERFUL education onthe topic of women and dating, then I recommendthat you check out my "Advanced Dating Techniques"program. In it, I spend several HOURS going into greatdetail and teaching the exact, step-by-stepprocess of communicating with women in a way thattriggers their SEXUAL ATTRACTION mechanism. I alsoteach you exactly what to do when you're beingtested by women... to turn her tests into evenMORE ATTRACTION for you. You'll also learn HUNDREDS of specifictechniques for approaching women, getting emailsand numbers, kissing, "getting physical", dating,and everything else that has to do with successwith women. You can go listen to samples and checkit out here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/AdvancedSeries/?cid=ZZVHZZ&lid=3&ll=1 If you like this "dating psychology" stuff,then I also recommend that you get yourself a copyof my "Sexual Communication" program. It's acomplete course in speaking this other "language"that I constantly refer to. If you want to master the art of creating"chemistry" and "sexual tension", then this is thetraining you need. Go here to watch some cool video clips of theprogram...http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/SexualCommunication/?cid=ZZVHZZ&lid=4&ll=1 Thanks for tuning in, and I'll talk to youagain in a few days. Your Friend, David D.P.S. Make sure you check out my online "catalog"of all my different programs... and watch thevideo clips of each of them:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/Catalog/?cid=ZZVHZZ&lid=5&ll=1P.P.S. If you'd like to send me a Success Story,Question, or Comment, follow these guidelines:1) Keep it short and to the point. Two paragraphsmax.2) Tell me what's working for you before you askyour question. I appreciate all of the "Your stuffis great" and "I don't need to tell you how wellyour stuff works" comments, but the fact is that IDO need to hear all of the specifics... becausethis helps other guys to see what's working indifferent situations.3) If you have a Success Story, write "SuccessStory" in the subject line of the email. I readthese first.4) At the end of the email, give me your initialsand tell me where you're from.5) Send it to me at:SuccessStories@DoubleYourDating.com ...don't just hit "reply" to this email. Thanks!
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