ATTRACTION isn't a choice. It's an emotional reaction.

"The Guy in the bar Story...Why should he have left the bar as soon as he gotthe waitress' phone number?This is "Ultra Extra Important" you said. I thinkI know why he should have left, he was probablystaring at her all night and she was turned off byit, but give me your complete insight on why heshould have left immediately after getting here-mail.Thanks, R." >>>MY COMMENTS: As I said in the newsletter you quoted above,this concept is VERY important. Understanding why you need to leave at thispoint is part of understanding the dynamic calledATTRACTION. So before I get into the specifics, let's talkabout the underlying process that createsATTRACTION...1) ATTRACTION isn't a choice. It's an emotional reaction. ATTRACTION is nature's way of taking over ourminds and bodies long enough to make sure that wemate with someone with the best possible genes. I realize that this sounds pretty "clinical"and lame, but it's the damn truth. Attraction isn't concerned with you, her, orlove. It's evolved over a loooong period of time,and it has a purpose that is very important.2) ATTRACTION isn't logical, in the sense that itisn't created by things that "should" create it. Buying women dinner and gifts, giving lots ofcompliments when you first meet a woman, andkissing up to women to get their approval areexamples of "logical" things that SHOULD createattraction... but don't. When you understand how attraction works, youbegin to see that it has a "logic" all its own. Attraction is one of my favorite subjects...and I think you should understand it if you wantto be successful with women. My second book iscalled "Attraction Isn't A Choice", and you cango and download the online version of it rightnow... which I highly recommend... right here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/AttractionBook/3) Women aren't attracted to guys who act likeneedy Wuss-Bags. When guys give lots ofcompliments, seek approval, act clingy, or try togo out of their way to be overly "nice", itusually backfires. Women run from Wussy men (either that or theygo shoe shopping with them... and the guy usuallypays).4) Unfortunately, many guys are mentallyprogrammed to a sort of "Default Wussy" mode ofbehavior when they encounter a woman that they'reattracted to. When you combine this Default Wuss mode withnervous body language, you create an almostimpossible barrier between you and ever creatingATTRACTION.5) Just like a painting or a song, too much canruin an interaction with a woman. You must know when to leave, hang up, or endthe interaction. Leaving at the right moment creates tension,anticipation and mystery. YOU EITHER INCREASE OR DECREASE ATTRACTION -IT'S ALWAYS EITHER GOING UP OR DOWN... Of course, there are more ingredients toATTRACTION, but these will set the stage for whereI'm going with this... In every situation, you can do something toINCREASE the ATTRACTION... and you can dosomething to DECREASE it. In other words, there'salways a way to dial up this magical emotion. And yes, you can increase the ATTRACTION evenwhen you've just met. In fact, this is often thebest time to do it. Let me ask you a question... What would most guys do in the situation withthe waitress (or maybe a bartender)? Imagine it. You're in a bar, you're chatting with the cutegal serving drinks or behind the bar. You're beingCocky and Funny, busting on her, etc. and she'senjoying your company. You say "Hey, do you haveemail?" and she writes it down for you... WHAT DO YOU DO? You could...a) Sit there and keep talking.b) Stay and talk to her a few more times.c) Wait around hoping that you can go homewith her.d) Leave. So let's do a little critical thinking aboutthis situation before I comment (or maybe thiswill be the comment, we'll see). If you:(a) sit there and keep talking, what's likely tohappen? In my experience, unless you're the ultimateMac Daddy of all time, the only place to go isDOWN. Think about it... you got her info. You did it.She's working. She's only going to get busy, whichwill probably make the conversation moredifficult. And then there's the risk of saying or doingsomething stupid, getting too drunk to make sense,or just having the interaction go cold. All in all, you have very little chance ofanything good happening, and a great chance ofhaving something not-so-good happening. Doesn't sound like a very good idea to me. If you:(b) stay there in the bar (maybe join friends thatshow up), and talk to her a few more times whileordering drinks, etc. what is likely to happen? Again, we're dealing with a situation thatalmost can't get any BETTER. Remember, she alreadygave you the info. Now she might start thinking"Oh, this is just another loser that hangs out allnight and gets drunk with his buddies... like theother 47 guys who hit on me." Or you might say something dumb... or you mighttip her too much or too little and make a strangeimpression... or any of a lot of things. All downside risk, no upside rewards. If you:(c) wait around hoping that you can go home withher, I think you're REALLY taking your chances inthe situation. Again, unless you're the ultimate pick-upartist of all time, you're not likely to be takinghome the bartender by sitting in front of her anddrinking all night... for the same reasons listedabove. But what if:(d) YOU LEFT IMMEDIATELY after getting her info? What effect does DISAPPEARING have on aninteraction like this one? Well, let me ask you: What effect doesdisappearing have IN GENERAL on people? It creates curiosity, mystery, etc. It makesthe other person think "I wonder where he/she hadto go so fast?" You can also combine this with having somethingvery INTERESTING to do. For instance, you mightsay:"Nice talking to you... I'm going to go meet upwith some friends to have some SERIOUS fun." This technique of leaving the moment I'vegotten a woman's information has worked WONDERSfor me... and for many guys I know. The long and the short of it is that if youstick around after you get the info, you create notension, no mystery, and no curiosity. On the other hand, if you LEAVE IMMEDIATELY,and have something interesting (even if you don'tsay what it is) to go do, then you're seen asbusy... the kind of guy who has a life... someonewho is in demand. Leaving turns up the ATTRACTION. It createscuriosity. Women are used to guys hanging on, clinging,and generally NOT having other things to do. It's something that will INSTANTLY separate youfrom other guys, and something that willdemonstrate all the right qualities with a singlemove. Remember, you can do things to INCREASE orDECREASE the ATTRACTION in any given situation. Irecommend that you start thinking of how toincrease it as much as you possibly can, becauseif a woman feels ATTRACTION, then almost nothingelse matters. Let's shift gears. When it comes to CREATING ATTRACTION, you cantake it to the next level... and the next... allthe way to the point of "getting physical" with awoman... ...I've gone from not being able to even TALKto a woman I don't know... to being able toapproach any woman in any situation and have aVERY HIGH chance of getting a date with her... andof course more, if I want. If you're reading this right now, and saying toyourself "I would really like to know how he doesthat", then I'd like to share the secrets withyou. And I'd like to do it at absolutely ZERO RISKto you. I want you to get a copy of my Advanced DatingTechniques CD/DVD Program... and I'll send it toyou without charging you up front. Really. Go through the WHOLE PROGRAM. TRY some of the things you learn. I absolutely guarantee that you will start tosee IMMEDIATE results. Women will respond to youdifferently, because you will see things from anew perspective. If you don't get immediate results, just sendit back and you won't be charged. Go check out some great video samples here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/AdvancedSeries/...and if you would like to learn the basics ofhow to be successful with women and dating, youneed to go download a copy of my online eBook"Double Your Dating". It and the three bonusbooklets that come along with it are a killerintroduction to my concepts and techniques. Youcan download it and be reading it within a fewminutes. It's here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/eBook/ I'll talk to you again soon. Your Friend, David D.P.S. I get a lot of questions in my mailboxasking me how I learned all of this stuff... andhow I figured out some of the secrets I'velearned about women and attraction. If you'dlike to read the story, go here:http://www.DoubleYourDatingProgram.com/e/10020/eBook/